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Post by Lady Elwen on Feb 26, 2005 1:35:46 GMT -5
Author's Name: The One and Only Skande Email: Skande@myway.comSubmission Title: Leave a Legacy Please leave reviews for Leave a Legacy in this thread. ~ Elwen
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Post by Lady Elwen on Feb 28, 2005 0:44:41 GMT -5
Ah, I absolutely adore your imagery. If there's one thing I can rave about in your writing, it's how you show things - the descriptions of the setting sun, as well as those of Aragorn were so well written, enough to see the picture in your mind. Nice concept - sweet to see Eldarion.  I really liked the idea of "Aragorn's legacy", and the note about the surviving Firstborn was a nice touch. Short and sweet - well written overall, and a good concept to try to capture. I think you did a pretty good job of it, too, so I commend you there. One question: is "smilingly" actually a word? It sounds a little funny, and you might want to change that... You're missing an "off" in an "off of" somewhere in the middle - sorry; I don't have the patience to go and find it again.... but aside from that, the whole thing looks good. Nice work! ~ Elwen |
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Post by The One and Only Skande on Mar 2, 2005 3:36:51 GMT -5
Thanks for reviewing, Elwen, and thanks for pointing those things out.
Alrighty then, found the missing word and changed it: Thanks for bringing that up.
As for the word "smilingly", I've always thought of it as a word, and my spell-check has, so I guess I never really considered that it might sound strange to some people. But I did change it; even if it is a word, I would prefer the story flow as smoothly as possible. :-)
Thanks again, and glad you liked it!
-Skande
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Post by Nurnoviel on Mar 2, 2005 4:03:53 GMT -5
Ahh... What could possibly be any more heart-warming than Aragorn thinking of his only son and his city? I love the language in this piece- the way you write is so evocative and unique.
I really loved the opening paragraph. It was a beautiful way to begin the story, and the image of Aragorn was etched into my imagination vividly.
The idea of Eldarion being Aragorn's legacy is a lovely concept, and you've handled it wonderfully. If only there were more writer's like you... ;D
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I really liked the idea of "Aragorn's legacy", and the note about the surviving Firstborn was a nice touch.
